Push
by Ella Arisa
Summary: Some people push you away to see if you'll pull them closer. AU.


They were really close when they were younger. Apart from his parents, Sanji maintained a good life still with his best pal, Zoro. Though he could have any stuff in life by just asking his people, Zoro, along with Sanji, both grew up as two hard workers believing in their effort that would eventually lead them to achieve good outcome. Two of them really had good times together in years they had spent. They played a lot and mingled with each other very well so they couldn't seem to be torn apart. Sanji and Zoro have affected their friend's lives so much and that was the reason why they both gained the same interest in one another. As they two finally chose to live alone in city, leaving the memories behind them, they developed a more intense feeling and began to be dependent to each other's side. The line between them started becoming more than just friends.

Zoro was a good wise state police as what he had dreamt about since he was six. Zoro was known for his willing to give all of him to be a good servant for people around him and city he was living. His fellow officers adored his spirit and compatibility in doing his job and his bright side too when it came for him to talk about friendships and treating people well. Sanji was a model because of his slim yet muscular body and good-looking face. He could make different expressions for different occasions, bring all what he wore to a higher level in fashion industry, and present a professional side of him as he always so totally involved in his work to satisfy his customers. They two had grown up as two different people when they were older, but, the good relationship they had built back when they were children shattered all bad opinions about how they couldn't be together that well.

Zoro was a bit quiet and serious because his job got him to be so, while Sanji was truly more open and smiley because that what he did for life. The two loved going out together at evenings to tell each other what went on at work. They sometimes just walked around the city park to let each other knew about things they wanted to pursue in life. Sanji was the one talking more, Zoro was there to listen to all of his words. But, it was not rare for Sanji to listen to Zoro's stories, too. Zoro was like that cool guy and Sanji was the cheerful one, but, they two eventually complemented each other. They always locked their hands while walking. Not to mention two cups of ice milk tea as their most favorite order ever. Twenty years of a super beautiful life, Zoro finally asked Sanji to be his lover and Sanji undoubtedly said yes.

* * *

If _life went well_ meant how much offers that Sanji recently got and how cool it was for Zoro to step to a higher rank at work, than it did. But, if it stood for the less frequency of meeting they had because the amount of job that truly vacuumed their attention, then it didn't. Two of them didn't make any plan yet to have a house for themselves, so, the distance they had to go through to meet one another in evening or night from each their apartments was only making the situation harder. Sanji visited Zoro at five pm after doing some shoots then prepared them a nice dinner to have. Zoro went to Sanji's place at night. He always had time though to watch some movies with him or simply had some wine at the balcony then went to sleep. Now, it was nearly impossible for both of them to find a matched schedule of themselves just to have a short meeting at one's place because Sanji had to travel back and forth from his apartment to this far but prosperous work place, while Zoro had these duties he should done to accomplish the target as the part of Forensic Investigation Service.

One night, they finally found a matched time to have dinner at Sanji's place. Zoro went in with his full formal uniform on his body. Sanji welcomed him with a very bright and had a kiss on his forehead given by his lovely green-haired man.

"Hello, commuter," Zoro started the conversation.

The word commuter referred to Sanji's daily life now as he commuted every day from home to work place for about forty minutes of travel. Zoro placed his black bag in Sanji's room just to make sure that works wouldn't distract his attention while having dinner.

"Well. Hello, investigator," Sanji replied while busy preparing the plates and the glasses on the table for tonight's dinner with some candles at the room.

They talked about how busy their lives were since work was getting tough. They both kept complaining of the aches and pains they felt in their bodies because there were so much pressure to handle while doing their jobs, yet they kept complimenting each other about how good they looked now and how could they miss each other this bad.

They were tired. They started blabbing some uncertain things about life and were not able to speak their minds up in a proper and understandable way. Sanji seemed to have the hardest time. He couldn't seem to bear it anymore.

"You know, I have to commute eighty minutes a day to work. Sometimes, you still need to meet me at home at night, but, I honestly feel so tired even just to talk to someone. You know, when I was offered this job, I felt I have reached one of my childhood dreams, as finally I can work with my dream designer and photographer for my dream brand."

Zoro was listening.

"I need to focus wholly in modeling."

Zoro moved his head forward to listen to Sanji's words better.

"I want a break."

Zoro shook his head in disbelief.

"You want a _what_?"

"I want a break. I want us to have some distance. I want us to break. I need to be alone to focus just on my modeling career. I want a break from this routine of meeting you here and there because I really want myself to be a successful model for now. You make me even tired because of this."

Zoro rubbed his forehead, a sign that he was frustrated and confused enough. He didn't lift his head up to see Sanji's eyes. He thought Sanji was just being a brat to catch more of his attention.

"I am extremely tired, yet I always look for free time just to meet you. I need you; I need to finish my job too. I need to bear it all to make me feel good in any of my life component, then. If I try to keep this run smooth, so why don't you? You can't just shut me down?"

Zoro didn't make the situation any better. Sanji was left shocked with what Zoro had said to him. He finally reached his point where he couldn't hold his anger plus dissatisfaction no more. Sanji harshly pushed his chair in. He went to his room and slammed the door, making that heart-breaking sound for Zoro to listen.

"Sanji, open the door," Zoro said after knocking on the brown door that Sanji locked.

Sanji let Zoro in yet gave him a cold shoulder as he just sat back down on his black chair at his desk.

Zoro turned the chair to have Sanji's face directing at him. He then lowered his body to be able to see what look Sanji had as he remained bowing his face. Zoro placed his warm hands on Sanji's knees, transferring his spirit to lift Sanji up. Maybe that was the only thing Sanji needed to bring his soul back to life. That was the only thing Sanji needed for a long, long time as he got more tired, sad, and lonely.

"I'm sorry," Zoro's voice cracked but he remained cool.

Sanji lifted his head up to see his lovely couple.

"We can go through this. We just gotta be strong," Zoro's eyes met Sanji's. Zoro gave his all to make sure that he didn't give a false hope. He just couldn't let his best friend and mate feeling hollow; he needed to give him the strength to be able to go through life together.

Zoro stood and pulled Sanji up with him. With his moroseness, Sanji buried his face on Zoro's chest. Zoro hugged Sanji to make sure that they truly could go through this. His cheek was on the top of Sanji's head when he started hugging him even tighter.

"We'll be fine," Zoro calmly said. He gave Sanji relaxing pats on the back.

* * *

They felt like their lives only had the tendencies to go worse, or _worser_. The communication didn't run well as they only had brief and general talk through iPhone and Skype. At the beginning, choosing to live alone in city seemed to be the best choice for their lives. At this very moment of their lives, work, surrounding people, and distance couldn't work together with their own plans to grant their wishes of having a prosperous and intimate relationship time together. They were so close to their dreams in work fields, yet they became eventually too far from this thing they actually wanted the most in their lives. Their relationship.

Zoro got home at approximately nine pm every day. It made him exhausted to welcome a guest at his place and even go to a certain place to be someone's guest at his place. Zoro turned to a quite zombie-like man after receiving this great yet tiring opportunity as a New York State Police Officer. This kind of job required a perseverance to finish the given duties and was a quite energy-sucking as the officer should accomplish the target to clear some cases up and always put up a good fight. Zoro was, though, eligible for this kind of job because of his years of studies and qualified training.

While Zoro was busy with cases, Sanji had to prove his clients that he was capable to bring many other sides of him while doing photo shoots or fashion shows. This wasn't rare for him to travel again from the planned meeting place to the location the crews wanted. They always looked for exotic and unique places to take some amazing shoots of the models. Plus, Sanji had to be able to give more than ten of pose variations to deliver a correlation between what he wore, where he was, and who he was as a model. Not to mention the quite hectic situation at the show backstage when he had to transform to one figure to another in clothes. The most satisfying moment was when he was invited by the designers to walk along with them at the front line, seeing the audience clapped, and receiving a bucket of roses for their success.

This Wednesday, they planned a movie night. Though this movie had been played for one hundredth times, Sanji always picked Armageddon as the movie they would watch tonight and Zoro just accepted. They had spent nights with watching movies, but, their habit would never change. They always set the little table in front of them while sat arm to arm on the soft light brown couch. They put a bowl of popcorn and two bottles of coke for accompanying them watching the movie. The twenty eight inches of flat-screen shaped television they both owned at each apartment was placed to lead them to be lost in their fantasies and imaginations. The premium set of home theatre also made the movie night felt more luxurious and special.

Sanji's favorite part was when Grace and Frost hugged each other as their simple farewell at the airport before Frost leaving the earth to beat the asteroid. Sanji would cry a river as he was not able to hide his sad feeling seeing the two creatures poled a part. Zoro's favorite one was none other than when Sanji cried on his arm or chest while watching the farewell and dying Harry Stamper in space. _Of course_.

This night wasn't like usual. Sanji didn't cry and Zoro didn't need to sober him. The job was again becoming their reason for this unsynchronized night. Their heads felt like one ton of stone and they barely opened their eyes for sleepiness. They started looking pale and wanted nothing but a tight and proper rest after work. Sanji was sitting on the black tall chair in the dining room near the television when Zoro leaned his head on the top part of the brown couch, taking a little time for rest. They were too tired to watch a movie and have a talk; they just couldn't bear the heaviness they got after work so they didn't even make it to half of the story. Sanji played with the glass filled with plain water, dying of boredom yet craving for sleep. They ignored each other as they maybe already reached what they called rest-time for now.

Sanji finally stood up to turn the television off. Zoro lift his head up to see what happened with this sudden silent.

"Go home. I have a photo shoot tomorrow morning at 6," Sanji said with a low-toned voice.

Zoro rubbed his corner of his eyes and did a short stretching. Looking around Sanji's apartment, he found it was already 11 pm.

"We just can't make it. Go home," Sanji was pissed about this situation.

Zoro exhaled. It was a deep breath. He cleared up his face and outfit for a while then wrapped up the papers he brought from his office in a leather dark blue bag.

"You know, pushing me away from your life like this, is not your true solution. We'll make it," Zoro said, softly, and was prepared already to leave for his home.

Sanji didn't seem to mind. He made himself concentrated on reorganizing things in the dining and living room that turned out didn't help getting them any closer and fine.

Zoro walked out heading to the door. Sighing, he turned around to have a final sight of his slim blonde.

"Good night."

* * *

Some people pushed someone away from their lives to see if he would pull them closer. While some other people pushed someone away, simply because they didn't need the person anymore.

There were only two possible reasons why Sanji did this to Zoro. Sanji pushed Zoro away from his life to make sure that he was worthy enough for Zoro, so he would sacrifice everything he had to eventually be with Sanji again. Or, Sanji pushed Zoro away from his life, simply because he wanted Zoro to get fucking out from his mind and heart. For the first time in his life, he didn't want anything else to bother him from reaching his career peak. For the first time in his life, Sanji didn't want Zoro to consume more his time and attention that he would wholly give for his modeling field.

Lucky Sanji, he spent almost all his life with this brave and determined guy. Zoro, actually along with Sanji, had committed to each of them not to let down and leave someone behind. They simply just couldn't move on while knowing one of them living and having hard times to be gone through alone. Zoro had promised to himself not to continue walking without his slim blonde darling.

_I miss you. I'll be on Skype at 10._

Sanji could barely open his small eyes. He slept for about 3 hours as he arrived home after a New York Fashion Week show. The room was dark; Sanji wasn't able to read the message notification that just popped out of his iPhone screen. He pulled his body and leaned on his grey bed prop. He turned his night lamp on to give a little brightness in the room. He didn't seem to get excited to see the message sender. He moved his sight to another part of his iPhone screen to see what time was it now. It was 9.57 at night. He hesitated, while regaining his awareness back from a quite good sleep. At the end, he jumped off his bed to open his Mac up and connect it to internet. He would join Zoro on Skype.

"Hi," Zoro appeared on the screen with his charming face.

Sanji gave him a little smile, not wanting to look that caring to finally be on Skype at night.

"So, how's life? It's been a week, huh?

"It's 10 pm already, Zo. Be quick, because I'm tired,"

"Okay. I just want to tell you something. I found it cute because it rarely happens in my office."

Sanji pretended looking at something else while his ears were fully ready to listen to what Zoro was going to tell.

"We had lunch together at the office cafeteria. I ordered a roasted chicken and salad, but I end up having two bowls of corn soup because I was that hungry. I picked black coffee-"

"That happens every day, Zo."

"Does it? Well. What I'm going to tell you is the conversation that we had this afternoon. We talked about our family. They are proud of their wives and husbands because the wives usually make them lunches packed in some cute lunch boxes and the husbands pick them up when the work is off. When they asked me about my family, I answered proudly, too."

Sanji remained giving a static expression while his heart started thumping unstable hearing such story.

"I told them how proud I am being with this person. I told them I could give my life up just to make this person stick to me through my lowest and constantly raving about shits. I think, even this whole day isn't enough to tell them about my feeling. This person is the reason why I can create who I really am, now," Zoro explained with quite whimsical gestures.

Sanji held his breath. His curiosity about who was this person giving so much meaning to Zoro's life had reached its boiling point, ready to blow out.

"It's you," Zoro smiled and pointed at the camera.

Sanji worked so hard not to present that clumsy wide smile to the camera. He slowly closed his mouth instead with his right palm to cover his exaggerate expression after hearing the story.

"Well, that was it. Sleep tight," Zoro ended the conversation.

Sanji nodded and inserted a soft good bye greeting to Zoro before finally turning off his Mac. That was actually a super ordinary story. Sanji could find it in every movie and book having romance in genre. But, the story was apparently different. Sanji felt flattered and it magically faded his work burdens away. Sanji felt his body as light as a cotton. Tonight, he would go to sleep light-hearted.

* * *

Weeks turned to months. Zoro had grown this new habit of taking a city train from his office to Sanji's to bring him a flower. If Sanji was there, he would give it to him then have a tiny piece of dialogues. If he couldn't find him at the agency office, he would simply leave the flower to the welcoming-girl at the front building of the office. She would give it to Sanji later and said it was from his darling, as Zoro had said. Sanji didn't seem to notice Zoro's effort yet, though. He remained static; focus wholly on shoots and shows. He just couldn't turn his face to anything and anyone else, unless they were some new contracts with some famous clients. He struggled hard to be on top of his career. Some things and people had to be shut down from his concern, he thought.

In one October bright afternoon, Sanji and Zoro had a walk at the park as usual. This was another chance made to probably bring back the romance and intimate between both of them. They were too silly, or simply nervous. The date, so far, went messy because of these and those stuffs came out from each other lips, turned out insulting each other. They were just like two grown up girls at their pre-menstruation syndromes as they couldn't seem to communicate well. The stuffs they said didn't click to each of their understandings. They willed to left the park earlier than they usually before. They walked at the park by themselves, apparently, only with different direction.

Sanji chose to have a short sit on the park bench beside the ice cream corner, when a lady had a sit beside him and started approaching him.

"Mine," Zoro briefly said to her when she wondered what kind of relationship both Zoro and Sanji were in.

Zoro was not too far from Sanji. He could clearly see what happened to Sanji and the lady while having their seats right there. The girl looked really flirtatious to Sanji and persistent in her trials to open Sanji's heart, even when Sanji obviously wasn't in the mood in giving a single fuck to everything she had done and said. Zoro then walked closer. Sanji looked up to see what the cause of this sudden shade was. Zoro had stood in front of him and brought up his really dashing look along.

"Let's go home," Zoro said to Sanji, gently.

Zoro placed his flawless face right at Sanji's front. Sanji stood to follow what path Zoro would take him to. The two finally got closer to one another, leaving two rolled eyes and one disappointed heart behind them. Sanji slipped his arm to Zoro's. They walked to the exit gate on the west, leading to either Zoro or Sanji's place this time. They chose.

* * *

They watched a situational comedy show on television this night. They chose to watch these certain of show because they wanted to be happier; they wanted to recreate a warmer and closer relationship between them. They got this channel where it broadcasted a non-stop comedy show at nine to eleven pm every day. They sometimes jumped to Disney Channel and found themselves laughing hard, even because of this kind of program showing how stupid people looked when they were in pranks. Sanji's favorite part was when he watched the repeated scenes of people showing their exaggerate expressions while they were in total shocks. Sanji would laugh out loud as he was not able to hide his happy feeling while punching objects and clapping his hands freely in the air. Zoro's favorite one was none other than seeing Sanji's eyes turned to lines while dying of excitement and finding himself as the object of Sanji's uncontrollable bounces. Of course.

They were in their peak of intimate, at this very moment of life. They were able to regain their courtship back after the break because they just couldn't easily forget what feeling they had developed for almost their whole lives. They enjoyed their television-time together, even much better than before. They still set the little table in front of them while sat arm to arm on the soft light brown couch and put a bowl of popcorn and two bottles of coke on it. They joked around and spent quality time for their own really well. They were proud of their habits in having a brotherly argue instead of a real tiring argue with some rude words coming out unfiltered. When two different thoughts surfaced the room, they chose to think about it wisely until they reached a true agreed solution by them instead of having a cold war because one's opinion didn't fit well on other's feeling. They were more likely to take life not too seriously. It was a real fun they were feeling, currently. It was not rare for them to be involved at their own gags, ended up receiving some brotherly fists and fights yet romantic hugs and kisses as a couple.

Sanji was concentrated on reorganizing things in the dining and living room, when his tip of right eye captured Zoro sleeping on the brown couch. He seemed to have no more energy left as he finally couldn't bare his need of sleep. He lost to his lack of sleep; he put his head unconsciously on the top part of the couch while still holding some thick books and many papers of cases he should read. Realizing he was not able to take Zoro to his bedroom, or simply to wake him up, Sanji placed a big white blanket to cover his muscular and well-built darling's body from cold. Sanji then headed to his bedroom and left the door wide opened.

Sanji heard that voice in the midst of his sleep. When he turned his face to see what that shadow was and slowly cracked his eyes open, Zoro's figure was there standing beside his bed already.

"Can I sleep here?"

"Come on in."

Sanji flipped the covers over. Zoro slipped inside the blanket on Sanji's bed until he was close enough to recognize Sanji's smell. He laid himself down, slowly wrapping his strong arms around his darling's waist. His tightest and warmest wrap he had ever given to someone in his life.

"Why did you do this to me?" Sanji spoke in shaky voice.

"Did what?"

"All of this. I'm feeling like I don't deserve such effort."

"Pulling you back to me was my only choice. I will do anything just to make you always stay with me."

Sanji moved his sleep position right away to face Zoro instead of the window on the right side of his bed. He pulled them together to a much closer hug. They both settled in each other's warm arms. They would have the best sleep ever as they finally were in the most pleasant time in their lives. They finally satisfied their needs of huddling together, chest to chest at one night.

Back when they were ten, they used to play kites at the wide abandoned park nearby their houses. When the wind blew Zoro's kite away, he ignored it and would enjoy his free time instead. He never huffed; he let his kite to the wind. It was totally up to the wind, whether it would blow the kite back to him as the owner or not. Facing that kind of situation when Sanji asked a break for them, Zoro didn't need to be in an extreme anger or fluster. If Sanji was really meant to be with him, he would be. It was totally up to fate whether they could be together or not. At least, Zoro had given a try.

Some people pushed someone away from their lives to see if he would pull them closer. When Sanji tried to push Zoro away from his life, it really was Zoro's time to prove he could pull Sanji even closer to him. The hardness, otherwise, pushed Zoro's willingness to show Sanji where truly he was belonging. His side.


End file.
